To the one that I hurt. I’m sorry.
I thought that what I was doing was okay. I was still upset at you for shutting me out for a month of our relationship and when things were finally getting better, I decided to do the same thing to you.
You tried. You wanted it to work and wanted me in your life. You told me you missed me and were hurt when I went weeks without talking to you. I hurt you when you saw me talking to him. I hurt you when I lied and said I would be back. You knew it wasn’t the truth and I saw it in your face. Yet you smiled, that sad, sweet smile, and didn’t say a word.
I didn’t care. I admit that. That month when you went into your deep depression and stopped talking to me, really effected me, and my feelings for you drifted away. So when we started talking again and you were finally ready to let me in, I rejected you. I made you chase me, and you knew I’d never stop running. I would go through periods where I wouldn’t think about you at all, and that could last for days, weeks even. Then you would text me, bring me back to reality, and I would see you for one blissful day. Then another few weeks would go by.
I knew what I was doing to you. And I’m sorry. And now that I see that and understand it, it’s already too late. You’ve moved on to someone new. Someone who probably gives you the time of day. Texts you back right away, and cares about every word you have to say. I’m happy for you. I am.
But once again.. To the one I hurt.. To the one who stopped wasting her time on a fucked up, all over the place person like me… To the one who realized that she deserved better, who deserved the world…